Quickies: While We’re On The Subject Of Romance

     This article from the Daily Telegraph purports to reveal the “most romantic” statements in the English language. The list it presents does have some striking statements on it, but they’re all from literature or cinema. In other words, they haven’t been tested in the crucible of reality.

     There are several well-proven romantic lines that really ought to have been considered, but to the best of my knowledge, they haven’t appeared in any form of fiction. Moreover, they’re exceedingly gender-specific. To wit:

     From him:

• “I have an eight-figure trust fund.”
• “Oh, him? He comes to my parties.”
• “Pretty, isn’t it? You can drive it whenever you like.”
• “That’s nothing. You should see it when I’m excited.”
• “Yes, I do have five large, empty closets. Why do you ask?”

     From her:

• “Flats hurt my feet.”
• “Pantyhose? Yuck!”
• “My parents are both dead.”
• “Of course they’re natural. Feel!”
• “I have a nine-figure trust fund.”

     Feel free to try them when the occasion warrants.