Tuesday, July 9, 2019

Conversations

     The Fortress’s menagerie includes four cats: Fluffy, Uriel the Great, and twin sisters Chloe and Zoe. As has been the case since cats first noticed that humans have eyeballs, they make a point of getting between us and whatever we’re currently trying to see. That includes computer monitors.

     However, on Tuesdays we confine the cats to “their” room, in anticipation of the imminent arrival of our cleaning service. And so, this exchange just took place:

FWP: It’s awfully strange to see you sitting there without a cat in front of your monitor.
CSO: I know. It explains a lot about my neck problems. Our next cat must be transparent.

FWP: The world has long awaited the GE Transparent Cat®.
CSO: It would be a big seller.

FWP: You know, this might explain the mania for ever larger TVs.
CSO: What, because the cats are getting bigger?
FWP: Yeah. Evolutionary adaptation. It’s a kind of Parkinson’s Law of the Domestic Feline.

CSO: “Cats will expand to meet the size of the video screen?”
FWP: And will tend to exceed it.

CSO: We’re doomed, aren’t we?
FWP: For a long time now, dear. You only just noticed?

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