Remember The Curmudgeon’s Carbohydrate Aphorism!

     I’ve been saying this for a while – well, yes; I’ve been saying many things for a while – but it seems to need repeating more often than most of my other spoutings:

The Curmudgeon’s Carbohydrate Aphorism:
Keep Thine Eye Fixed Upon The Doughnut,
Lest Thou Pass Unaware Through The Hole.

     Sounds silly, doesn’t it? The sort of farcical toss-off a no-status blatherer would emit solely for its memorability, right? So having chuckled over it, my Gentle Readers can forget it and move on to something that matters. Maybe putting pants on lamb chops or sifting the cat box.

     But no. It’s a reminder that there are reasons for things, especially the things people say and do. When a man says or does something that appears to defy all reason, we mustn’t simply dismiss it as a “brain fart.” It’s imperative that we grant him the presumption of rationality. We must probe for his reasons, not assume that he had none.

     Two days ago, a pompous ass who goes by the name of Thomas Chatterton Williams – many pompous asses sport a family name as their middle name; it suggests a pedigree the rest of us lack – penned an opinion piece for that most self-important of all East Coast publications, The Atlantic:

“Today, like five years ago, a controversial man has been transformed overnight into a one-dimensional saint, marshaled in a culture war that precludes measured thought. Once again, Americans are being asked to genuflect before an idol.” pic.twitter.com/CC1d8FG1Ll

— Thomas Chatterton Williams (@thomaschattwill) October 2, 2025

     The column is behind a paywall. However, the mite of it quoted at Fox News should suffice to convey its substance:

     "In the feverish weeks since Charlie Kirk’s assassination, the MAGA right is undergoing its own religious ferment, animated by a new martyr. Just as the left used Floyd’s death to justify and hasten all manner of political ends, the right is invoking Kirk’s name to advance illiberal aims and silence opponents," The Atlantic's Thomas Chatterton Williams argued. "In death, Kirk has become a cudgel."
     The writer claimed that Kirk, like Floyd, was a "controversial man" who had been "transformed overnight into a one-dimensional saint" — being used to fuel a culture war that defies reason.
     "Once again, Americans are being asked to genuflect before an idol," he added.

     Fox contributor Marc Tamasco notes that Williams’s column “sparked online fury.” No doubt. But ought we to stop there?

     The Carbohydrate Axiom suggests that we shouldn’t. It’s only reasonable to assume that Williams foresaw the furor. It’s equally reasonable to assume that he desired it. We should assume that a man intends the foreseeable consequences of his actions, shouldn’t we?

     That’s not to say that we shouldn’t be angry about Williams’s paralleling of a violent career criminal with a decent young man whose “crime” was to talk to college students. Anger is appropriate. But let’s not let that anger stall our thinking processes. Why did Williams set out to provoke us? What was his aim? Even a pompous ass must be assumed to intend what he can easily foresee.

     Anger is a consuming thing. It wears us out, depletes our energy for other undertakings. It also deflects our attention. The combination makes it a lot easier to “pass unaware through the hole”... and a lot more likely.

     Leftist opinion-mongers don’t expect to influence their own devotees all that much. They’re already compatibly aligned. No, it’s much more likely that Williams wrote that column and The Atlantic published it, for the effect it would have on us.

     It’s worth remembering the advice D’Artagnan gave to Louis XIV’s twin brother Philippe, who was intended to replace the Sun King on the throne of France:

     “If you are to rule this great nation, you must learn restraint. Keep cool in battle or in sports. Be angry—but in cold blood.” [Alexandre Dumas, The Man in the Iron Mask]

     Don’t give the Left’s pompous asses what they want from us.