Monday, July 2, 2018

Another Argument for NO Family Reunification

I've written before about the common use of marriage to someone from the 'Old Country' as a way of bringing in people with preferential visa issuances. It's one of the things that has more than one downside:

  • The gene pool of that immigrant family is tainted by inbreeding.
  • It lends itself to a system of pressure upon children (both male and female) to marry strangers. I've actually known several men who faced this pressure; unlike the women, the consequences of that marriage were less for the males. They seldom faced the threat of physical violence - either by family members eager to sponsor the newcomer, or by spouse. All were able to end the first marriage without problems. The women, on the other hand, often endured years of an oppressive living situation, and had the additional complication of children, as well. Coming from a culture in which the man has complete control over the children, American divorce laws and customs caused major conflicts. Several had to leave their children with their ex-husband in order to escape.
  • The cultural assimilation (yes, I DO consider that a good thing) is slowed, if ever it exists. The natural American tendency to create cross-cultural families is mitigated, and adoption of American values is blocked.
Any future attempts to use the Family Reunification ploy should be ONLY for minor children - and, that only with DNA verification.

Yes, I do believe that some - too many - will use fraud to circumvent the rules.



As someone who married an "import" ;) there certainly were issues with her adaptation. And she held onto a staggering sense of nostalgia for her home for over a decade.

That changed when she went (with the kids) to visit last summer. Telling me "90% chance I'm never coming back" when she left, I insisted she go anyway. Within three days she was telling me she made a huge mistake, and wanted to come home [to America]. (I have to admit that, after that phone call, I cued up Emperor Palpatine's quote "Everything is proceeding as I have foreseen." I knew she'd feel that way, but she had to experience it herself.)

She stands for the Star Spangled Banner at attention, hand on her heart - unlike too damned many native-borns.

But she's assimilated. Too many come in, nestle into a community of their countrymen, and don't.

Linda Fox said...

I do understand the mixed feelings of one who had another home. Sometimes, the culture of America can be both strange and off-putting.
You made a wise choice - she left, compared her rosy memories with the reality, and made a CHOICE to return, and be fully American.